During my frequent trips to the Bay Area, I’ve made this ‘London-Esque’ downtown retreat my unofficial HQ. I’m writing this sitting in their secluded sun-drenched yet drafty courtyard, after a tasty soup and quiche lunch. The Battery is quite an oasis within the city, which has been sadly blighted since the COVID pandemic. It is situated on the Northwest side in an old factory building that used to manufacture marble tiles. It was established by the founders of the original Bebo online social network and is intended as an escape for tech enthusiasts. The club design is on-trend (plenty of exposed brickwork and artistically decorated warehouse spaces), and the menu includes the regular avocado on toast benchmark. Growing up as a Gen Xer, I did not have a MySpace page, and I believed digital Casio watches, Ragu sauce, and Deloreans were as good as it could ever get. Nevertheless, I look the part: I work in gaming and I’m a walking mid-life crisis decked out in an optimistically youthful cap, hoodie, and Levi’s jeans.
The staff are lovely, making me feel right at home, and they’re not above a bit of cheeky banter. I’m from London, and yes, I am trying all the chairs. I’ve taken advantage of the ‘bring up to five friends’ rule here on a few occasions, entertaining over coffee, proudly curated cocktails, and highly enjoyable meals. The fare is delicious, modern, and not expensive considering California prices, served in a large open space (currently) being renovated. There are three different bars to choose from: an arty space with coloured windows, a library/study, and a party room – DJs and dancing are guaranteed at weekends. Members are very friendly and social. I met an elegant and refined gentleman psychiatrist last time. Although I am not a gentleman who prefers a gentleman type of gentleman, I was chuffed to know ‘I’ve still got it going on’ and can chill seamlessly with the locals!
There is also a dedicated quiet workspace, a games room, and an events room. The club has an excellent schedule of activities – I attended a proper comedy night one Friday, with Nick Kroll as a surprise A-list guest. Some events are on the Penthouse level, which looks stunning, and the club has two-star Michelin-rated hotel rooms, but I haven’t made it to those lofty heights yet! If you’re staying in downtown San Francisco, the Battery Club is an excellent base. I’d recommend a visit and an awkward boogie with an assortment of enthusiastic arrhythmically twitching tech geeks of a weekend. Love you. Miss you.
